Perfectionism, presence, and permission, with Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer
I’m used to Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer cracking my heart, with her poetry and general beingness. But during my interview with her on Tuesday, she surprised me with a one-two punch of sheer logic.
First, with her daily commitment to her creative practice.
Second, with her admission of her own All Or Nothing behavior.
Oh, hello, MIRROR.
Rosemerry writes a poem a day. She has for 13 years. It’s a commitment she made to offset her tendency toward perfectionism. One simply cannot write a masterpiece every day.
(Fans of her daily poems may disagree.)
She also said these words: “I either do yoga every day. Or I don’t do yoga.”
Holy, SAME.
I’ve been known to be a wee bit precious about my writing. I, on occasion, have sat down to my keyboard and stared at the blank page waiting for mastery to surrender into my typing hands. Waiting, then slamming the laptop shut when all that appears BLAH BLAH BLERGY BLERG BLAH. And other nonsense.
Like Rosemerry, I also do yoga every day. Or not at all.
(Ask my mat. It knows ALL my secrets.)
Just before I hopped on the call with Rosemerry, I sat with my self-judgment around my latest Call to Action--the MiddleAgedLadyShit book club. Created by me, for me (and you), based on two rules:
READ.
REPEAT.
Ask me how much I’ve read since I made this declaration.
Not a single page.
Ooooh, how the self-judgment swirls around this nugget of truth.
That loud mouth inner critic loves pointing out my imperfections and perceived failures. It laughs at me, with glee.
Then Rosemerry. Sweet, kind Rosemerry, shares with vulnerability a tendency to want to leave the moment, to wish for a different experience. For others and for herself.
She shares with me these words.
“Yes. Sometimes it’s like that.”
Oh, sweet permission.
Not trying to make something different. To rescue. To project preferences of something other than what is true in the now.
She goes on to say, “… I could say yes to everything that happened. To not fight it, to not need it to be a different way. It changed everything…”.
Everything.
Sometimes, it’s like that.
Sometimes, I struggle with routines.
Sometimes, routine is what I truly need.
Sometimes, I take breaks between books.
Sometimes, I choose my screen over the printed page.
Sometimes, my perfectionism gets in my way.
Sometimes, I judge myself too harshly.
Yes. Sometimes, it’s like that.
Full interview with Rosemerry coming soon! In the meantime, check out https://ahundredfallingveils.com/. There’s a poem every day!
